[April 16, 2024]

 

the time ticks as the realization of what was done and how many times as the clock hands shift more and more towards what people can and cannot do. 

 

its not a big deal - victimizing the individual more and more as the reality of hurt and what changes and normalizes. 

 

[still alone together] the real of the king of being with someone but always fucking up and being alone. 

 

[not yet.] my own correlation of the power dynamics connecting to the version of truth. the lack thereof truth and want to be true to yourself. she answers in a way that makes you question the relationships. the want but not wanting to be this way. 

 

[why not - not yet?] 

the reaction of a relationship of indifference. why or why not with the dynamics of unequal power that makes trauma and violence. 

 

i mention it and she says - not yet. why that to- my thought of the importance of power in relationships with this “temporary gratification” — the less past but less truth of the person - this safety net while being unsafe too. 

 

[safe while being unsafe] the can and cannot resulting in a pact that’s indifference from right and wrong.